I’m cheating here. I know this. There was already a Noise du Jour, placed surreptitiously by the ever elusive Miss Gauger, in the early pre-dawn hours, as is her wont. The melodious strains of The Baseballs’s anachronistic efforts could, however, do with a counterbalance. Don’t you think? I am here to provide that very service.
Arrington de Dioyso is a musician who specializes in both Tuvan throat singing and bass clarinet. This may seem like an odd combination. It is, indeed, an odd combination. Should that not be strange enough, his newest album, Malaikat dan Singa, is a collection of poems by William Blake, the famed poet and painter of bizarre shit and/or lizard men. Also, all the words have been translated into Indonesian. So yeah, William Blake as sung by a Tuvan throat singer in Indonesian set to distorted bass clarinet and rhythmic drumming.
Oh yes, there’s also the accompanying video. Not much to say about that. It’s best if you just find out for yourself.
Everyone’s favorite holiday is swiftly approaching. That’s right, December first is World AIDS Day, that magical day when we all gather around the AIDS tree and sing AIDS carols. Or maybe it’s a holiday invented to help spread awareness about a horrible disease. I can never be sure.
To bring awareness to this awareness bringing day in Germany Regenbogen e.V. has teamed up with das comitee to bring us “AIDS IS A MASS MURDERER” an inventive — and NSFW — campaign featuring nubile young women copulating with the likes of Saddam Hussein, Joseph Stalin, and, of course, Adolf Hitler making for disturbing images like this. Of course, if you are going to go all Godwin’s Law on the HIV you might as well go balls deep, so to speak, which leads, of course, to the horror of the television ad shown above; an ad that really draws the attention away from AIDS and places it squarely on, well, fucking Hitler.
As detective Leslie Madison surveyed the scene two things struck him. The first, that their Jane Doe was laid out in the fashion he had become intimately familiar with a decade ago: frozen solid, the coal in the eye sockets, the nose severed from the face and the carrot jammed viciously inside the nasal cavity, the hat nailed to her head. More chilling was the second, that of the soundless video looping itself over and over on the monitor. That face; it haunted his nightmares. He thought everything had ended that fateful night, down at the Arctic Cat dealership, but he was wrong. Mecha-Frosty was back and he was the only man who could stop him. The game had begun…anew.
What else can one say, really? Having viewed hundreds of hours of indescribable weirdness spewed forth from The Land of the Rising Sun over a period of years, I may have finally reached my limit. I have been struck dumb with fantastical nonsense; my brain unhinged by ultra-violent absurdity. I have been laid low by RoboGeisha.
From Noboru Iguchi, director of Machine Girl, RoboGeisha is the story of a robot geisha who fights ninjas, other robot geishas and robot geisha ninjas. The trailer consists of a long list of various robot geisha attributes, read aloud by a man with a ball-gag in his mouth. We learn that RoboGeisha has swords in her arms and that she can shoot rockets. She can also transform into a car, which is especially helpful when fighting assassins with mini-guns instead of breasts. Also, tengu milk. I’ll offer no explanation for that last one, you’ll just have to see it for yourself.
Bookended by scenes from an episode of Rod Serling’s Night Gallery, entitled “Professor Peabody’s Last Lecture” what follows is madness of the highest order. I can’t really explain what ensues but it involves J-Pop and choreographed dance moves.
Plumbed from the depths of Something Awful comes one goon’s justification for rape; a heady mixture of pseudo-philosophical posturing with healthy doses of nerd-rage and unfulfilled sado-fetishistic fantasies. Surely, however, this would be nothing but another shut-in’s rant on the internet without the aid of the two Playmobil-inspired individuals. It is most certainly their vacant eyes, the inexplicable nudity of the male character, the silent, smiling demeanor of his lady friend that make Stephen Hawking’s monotonous exposition that much more unsettling. Don’t even ask why they’re on a tennis court. Just. Don’t.
This is one of those clips that any comment from yours truly would ruin. Let it be said that patience is a virtue and by the time the video concludes, you’ll know why this has appeared in our pages.
There seems to be some dispute amongst the animals of the woods as to whether or not Mr. Ando is a penguin as he claims or is, in actuality, a human. There is no disputing that all of the aforementioned animals have the same, human face or that a fish sings a song about loving Mr. Ando and wishing to sleep with him even though he is a fish and smells very fishy. All this from the mind of Takashi Taniguchi.
In sheer defiance of the World Wide Web Consortium's will, Ectomo was designed using a non-web-standard font. Luckily, it is included in the excellent font pack released by the H.P. Lovecraft Historical Society, which can be freely downloaded in Mac and PC formats here. Ectomo should still look fine without it, though.