Admiral ‘Spike’ Blandy and his wife celebrate the success of Castle Bravo, the detonation of the world’s first practical hydrogen bomb — and the largest nuclear explosion ever set off by the United States — at Bikini Atoll, Marshall Islands on March 1, 1946. The fallout plume spread dangerous levels of radiation over an area over 100 miles long, including inhabited islands.
Records showing fallout levels from the cake are unknown. However, testimony from those who attended the event depicts a frosting that was nice to look at, but inedible otherwise. The raspberry filling was said to have been delicious. Five people fell ill, though this was attributed to excessive amounts of Scotch.
Update: Christ, have I been doing a lot of these lately or is it just me? Anyway, as wile_e_quixote points out in the comments, this photo does not depict the celebration after Castle Bravo, but a previous exercise involving atomic bombs. We now return you to your regularly scheduled program.
Newsweek has a letter, written by Kurt Vonnegut and dated May 29, 1945, from a new collection of the late authors writings entitled Armageddon in Retrospect. The letter details his time as a P.O.W., which would become the basis for his most famous work: Slaughterhouse-Five; or, The Children’s Crusade: A Duty-Dance With Death.
On about February 14th the Americans came over, followed by the R.A.F. Their combined labors killed 250,000 people in twenty-four hours and destroyed all of Dresden—possibly the world’s most beautiful city. But not me.
After that we were put to work carrying corpses from Air-Raid shelters; women, children, old men; dead from concussion, fire or suffocation. Civilians cursed us and threw rocks as we carried bodies to huge funeral pyres in the city.
Reading the letter in its entirety it was interesting to note that, even in his personal correspondences, he employed the repeating “tics” that can be called a hallmark of his work.
The Mattel Agent Zero M Sonic Blaster 5530 fires compressed air with a deafening blast. Our measurements top out at 157 dB–above a level that can do permanent damage to the hearing of an adult. We rate the toy Not Acceptable.
Some examples from a British game, circa 1940, called “Vacuation”; the object of which was to “complete evacuation by discarding every card in the hand.” The packaging reads:
Vacuation
TOPICAL AND FASCINATING
BRITISH MADE
THE GAME OF THE MOMENT
A GAME FOR ALL AGES.
Some pages from a 1950s pamphlet entitled “Protection from the ATOMIC BOMB” which outlines the proper procedures when a nuclear cataclysm occurs. This is easily my favorite page. Indeed I was previously unaware that, should I witness a flash of light brighter than the Sun, I should immediately do a face-plant and stay down for one minute because really, once your retinas have been seared by an atomic explosion, there’s not much else to do. After that one minute though, you should be able to get up and go about your business, safe in the knowledge that you’re too smart for those Communists.
The gasmask is an integral part of any space-hobo’s fashion arsenal, and while there’s a nearly infinite number of stylistic permutations from which to choose the mask that best suits you nearly all of them are drab militaristic affairs. Hardly surprising considering they’ve never been intended as anything other than tools to avoid taking lung-fulls of poisonous gas or air swirling with microscopic debris during a siege.
Thankfully an enterprising designer, Diddo Velema, saw the gaping couture void in post-apocalyptic style and decided it needed a good filling, creating high fashion gasmasks, studded in diamonds and logos, thus cementing her place in the annals of fashion history.
Personally I prefer the understated elegance of the Vuitton, but if gaudy is your thing there’s more than enough Gucci analog to go around. Hit the jump for larger versions of the masks.
As you know yesterday was Brownlee’s birthday which meant that today I had to take an extra long shower. It’s no use though, no matter how long I scrub I just can’t get clean. In any event here is a nice little animated sandwich of spoof-tastic Fox Kids and Kids’ WB cartoons between two, moist slices of anime. I hope they will entertain you, our loyal readership, and I pray that, perhaps, they will help me to repress the events of last evening. Please, God…
• FLCL: We’ve entered the final half of this spectacular mini-series, and only two more to go. Will you just look at those eyebrows.
•Eek! The Cat and The Terrible Thunderlizards: Eek! did a number of film spoofs during its run and the two that stand out, to me, are “Lord of the Fleas” in which Eek is trapped in a shopping mall with some penguins — one of whom hysterically exclaims “Shut-up, Piggy!” — and this episode entitled “Eekpocalypse Now!, which thoroughly hits upon every major joke one could make about Coppola’s film. This one is for the adults, unless you were an eight year-old who loved movies about Vietnam. The Terrible Thunderlizards was its own show but was later merged with Eek! to create a variety show more like our next two entries.
•Tiny Toons: “A Quack in the Quarks” is the second episode of this seminal show and features a loose parody of Star Wars and a plethora of fourth wall shattering humor. In this episode Plucky Duck is kidnapped by aliens to Planet X to save it from the nefarious plot of Duck Vader. This was the beginning of a real golden age of Warner Brothers cartoons in the late 80s/early 90s that include Animaniacs, Freakazoid, and the Animaniacs spin-off Pinky and The Brain. Oh, and a Watchmen reference!
•Animaniacs “Super Strong Warner Siblings” is a brilliant send-up of the Mighty Morphin’ Power Rangers which always marked the end of cartoon time. Animaniacs also did an Apocalypse Now parody which, while excellent, did not follow the plot as closely as Eek!. Next up is one of the many “Good Idea, Bad Idea” clips followed by my favorite, Pinky and The Brain. In this episode, entitled “Battle for the Planet”, Brain once again acknowledges his Orson Welles influence by attempting to fake an alien invasion ala the Mercury Theater’s broadcast of War of the Worlds.
•Paranoia Agent: Someone has some unpleasant secrets…
As a child you may remember the moments of abject terror that you felt between the time when the lights in your room being switched off and when you passed out from sheer exhaustion. Those minutes stretched themselves into hours as you huddled, alert to even the slightest sound, under your blanket, its protective shell broken only by a small opening in order to allow fresh, cool air to enter so that you could breathe. Wrapped in your cloth cocoon you were safe from Closet Monsters, Boogeymen, and Dire Otters.
Fast forward and you have, hopefully, outgrown your fear of the dark. Certainly, such ridiculous fears like being torn apart by over-sized aquatic mammals are best left in the hazy land of childhood. You know now as an adult — older, wiser, and with a trail of life experiences behind you — that such fears are totally unfounded, especially when cast in the light of real threats like Natural Disaster, Terrorism, and People — No Doubt Minorities — Coming To Take Your Stuff.
We’ve profiled other bedroom protection accessories before but they pale in comparison to the level of protection offered by the Quantum Sleeper, a device that takes the protective blanket and replaces it with a bulletproof shell, complete with a bevy of features from a rebreather and “Biochemical Filtered Ventilation” to a refrigerator, microwave, toilet system, and DVD player. That is to say that the Quantum Sleeper is not so much a bed but more like a smaller, safer house inside your house, that also happens to be a bed.
The inventors of the Quantum Sleeper are quick to point out that they developed it before September 11th, lest you think they are merely reactionaries or overly paranoid when, in fact, they are just being practical. Unfortunately this fantastic contraption is unavailable as of today, the inventors are still looking for funding. They estimate that a unit would cost somewhere in the area of one hundred, thirty-five thousand dollars to manufacture. They do, however, have a demonstration model that they made from wood, a decidedly less fire, tornado, chemical, and machine-gun resistant material than advertised, but capable nonetheless of giving prospective investors an idea of the device’s real world attributes and that is, at least, one step forward for your peace of mind. Isn’t it?
The U.S. Navy would do well to take note of these commercials. While theysubjectus to Keith David narrating footage of damp Navy personnel doing their best to look grim and determined and not, say, constipated to the melodious grunting of generic Nü Metal the Japanese have taken a different and, perhaps, more efficient tact. Aware that the public at large is aware that war is a serious undertaking, the Japanese Maritime Defense Force entices recruits by making you feel that by enlisting you too can be part of a crack force of anime superheroes, prepared to protect your homeland. Or you can be part of a dance troupe specializing in synchronized hip gyrations. Whichever floats your boat, so to speak.
Not since George Carlin’s “Seven Words You Can Never Say On Television” has swearing been so artfully rendered. Not content to relegate the intellectually lazy portions of the English language I love so well to inappropriate situations, I couldn’t be more pleased that this work is available as a print, and that soon expletives will dot my wallscape as well as my language.
I used to play Warhammer years ago as a small awkward boy in the back my friend’s father’s toy store. Every week the store would close early and my friends and I would wage epic war on a massive table covered in detailed landscape we had all put hours of work into. We knew with a grim certainty that this was as cool as we were ever going to get.
Years later I have abandoned that past time in favor of pursuits more closely related to poking unnecessary holes in my face and perfectly replicating the coiffure of a teal cockatoo. However, it may be time to dust off those miniatures once more.
What? You thought I got rid of them?
Apparently Ectomo is a playable type in the Warhammer Universe! Oh sure, they call them “Amber Wizards” but doesn’t that gesture look a bit too familiar? And I’m fairly certain those are the exact dimensions of Eliza’s horribly deformed equine skull resting atop that pike. Further evidence is in the very description of the class:
Their magic is merciless and inhuman, caring little for the ways of Mankind and recognizing the savage heart that lies under the veneer of civilization that adorns every Human soul.
Early in the 22nd Century the recently formed World Government passed legislation declaring there could exist only one fast food mascot. The reasoning behind the decision remains a mystery to this day, though conspiracy theorists and rational thinkers suspect it was simply a display of power by an infant government. The tyrannical government’s method of pairing down what had become a veritable orgy of brightly colored clowns and cows with opinions on our dietary habits? Gladiatorial combat.
Long and hard they fought, showing bravery and cowardice in equal measure. Finally, from the viscera strewn pits of endless fighting emerged a victor. A relative unknown in his world, yet no less savage and cunning for his lack of infamy. This man, nay, this hero goes by the name of McClucksky. May his epic never be forgotten.
A sketchbook completed by a British soldier between 1917 and 1918 during tours through Belgium and France. His work serves as a powerful reminder that art can, and more often than not does, come from some of the most horrific places imaginable.
The Asian giant hornet is the worlds largest hornet, reaching lengths of up to 2.2 inches. Their venom is acidic, and contains mandaratoxin which, in sufficient doses, can cause death in humans, even those without allergies. Asian giant hornets are responsible for about seventy deaths a year. The venom also contains a pheromone that attracts other hornets, allowing them to predate in groups.
It is this which helps them to overcome European honey bee hives. Thirty hornets can massacre thirty-thousand European honey bees, which they behead or bisect with their powerful jaws, and whose stingers cannot penetrate the hornet’s thick exoskeleton. They then consume the bees’s honey and take the bees’s larvae back with them, to feed their young.
The native Japanese honey bee, however, has figured out a way to fight back. When the initial hornet scout approaches the hive they lure it inside. Once inside, they swarm the hornet en masse, covering it entirely and keeping it from moving. They then begin to vibrate their flight muscles. This has the effect of raising the temperature of the honey bee mass to 47 °C (117 °F). The honey bees can just tolerate this temperature, but the hornets cannot survive more than 45 °C (113 °F), and are effectively roasted alive.
In sheer defiance of the World Wide Web Consortium's will, Ectomo was designed using a non-web-standard font. Luckily, it is included in the excellent font pack released by the H.P. Lovecraft Historical Society, which can be freely downloaded in Mac and PC formats here. Ectomo should still look fine without it, though.
