As much as we enjoy conjecture and extravagant speculation regarding the future and the treasures it holds it’s a shock when something from the pages of the professional speculators, aka sci-fi authors, worms its way into our disappointingly nonfictional reality. Though in all fairness, less so when it comes from Japan.

Yet the newest way in which the metropolitan Japanese surprise and confound we less progressive western dullards is a bit surprising even with the knowledge of its origins. Frenetic salarymen dissatisfied with the pink-cheeked rush the pharmaceutical melange of energy drinks has to offer can now pop in to Tenteki10 for a vein full of “vitamins and other nutritional supplements”.

Yes that’s right; if you’ve got $20 (2,000 Yen) and 10 minutes you can have a doctor stuff your veins with the mysterious “vitamins and nutritional supplements” for what they describe as a “pick-me-up”. While I’m intimately familiar with the potentially less than pleasant effects of a botched intravening (to say nothing of potential “supplement” overdoses) I can’t help but wonder when we’ll have similar set ups in the States.

Even now you can swing by your local plastic surgeon’s office for a speedy syringe full of botulism for all your muscle paralysis needs. How long until Starbucks trades baristas for nurses? And further, how long until our “supplements” are supplemented with the wares of illicit chemists and old-fashioned coffeehouse snobbery is supplanted by a caste system of stat-boost aficionados?

My hope is not long; my daily ritual of chasing down a handful of No-Doze with three or four Viente Quad-Americanos has long since stopped clearing away the borderline somnambulance of the morning.

Drop-by IV drip service helps stressed Tokyoites [Japan Today : Inventor Spot]

As regular readers are doubtlessly aware, Eliza and I have a bit of an Andrew W.K. fixation… in particular, his career defining anthem to partying, “Party Hard.” We love the energy of the song, its absolutely fanatical devotion to the concept of not-just-partying, but partying until you sneeze brains. Its like partying is some sort of abstract state, the ultimate opposite of Zen.

But at the same time, we have to admit, we don’t follow the immortal wisdom of Andrew W.K. We don’t party hard. Not really. Not all the time. Only sometimes, and as the years pass, the periods between parties grow like tapeworms feeding off of our lives.

What the hell happened to us, guys? Like us, you, well… we know you work all night, and when you work you don’t feel all right. But we keep doing it. What went wrong in our lives? When did we forget how to party?

As a Monday morning reminder of what every day or every week is supposed to be like, Ectomo is proud to present this educational film: The Night of Hardest Partying. Two brave college freshmen — a dork and a Jewfro, sober as birds — begin partying so hard that it quickly snowballs into seventeen.

Guys, this is what pure, unapologetic, unremitting fun looks like when the tumors of snark and cynicism have been amputated and cauterized. If you can’t just go out and have fun like this, your life is missing something. I know mine is.

Party Hard [YouTube]