Say what you want about organized religion, but if the birth of Christ had featured the original members of the Monster Squad with The Bride of Frankenstein as the mother I’d be rolling in the aisles with the best of them.

Isabel Samaras [Drawn!]

This is Louis, a six foot wide octopus, and in the midst of Louis is his Mr. Potato Head, which he received as a Christmas present. Do not, under any circumstances, try to take Louis’s Mr. Potato Head.

‘He’s fascinated by it,’ said Matt Slater, of the Blue Reef Aquarium in Newquay, Cornwall. ‘He attacks the net we use to fish the toy out every time we try to take it away.’

You have been warned.

The octopus who loves his Mr Potato Head [Metro] : Spluch

This Christmas, in an effort to clear our heads of the noisome din involved with visiting family members you don’t see all too often, my brother and I took a brief break in my hovel on the hill. My apartment is not like the other EctoEditors; it is not a bright, urban loft filled with offensive artwork like Brownlee’s, it isn’t rife with aged mahogany bookshelves and leather bound books as I imagine Rosenberg’s (having always been blindfolded and told to keep my hands at my sides during visits), nor is it a kiddy pool full of filth-water bordered by a trough, parked in front of a bank of monitors like Eliza’s.

No, where I rest my head is a dark, cold, cement affair; a soul crushing void in which only a few, deeply troubled, individuals find respite. Bookshelves of varying size and description, many hastily constructed with wood scraps and exposed nails with a taste for blood, line the walls, supporting a vast collection of graven images, idols, and blasphemous literature.

It had been quite some time since my sibling’s last visit to my pit, and though he was obviously fearful of my tentacular accoutrements, I felt the need to show off my recent acquisitions; soothing fear with knowledge like the Greek scholars of old, but with less catamitism.
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Ectomo wishes you and yours the very best on this joyous Christmas Day. We hope that while opening your presents you keep in mind the true spirit of the holiday and remember the story of little baby Santa Claus, born to a traveling encyclopedia salesman, Joe, and his wife, Mary, in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania in the pool shed behind the Holiday Inn Express, for the hotel was sold out and yea, it was indeed Joe’s fault for truly he traveled much and should have known better.

But lo, in the morning did three housekeepers, made to work but getting time and a half, bring them gifts of towels and shampoo and soap and let them bathe in the employee bathroom and were, perhaps, slightly aghast and confused as to why Mary decided to give birth in a pool shed instead of going to the hospital but they did not pry for it was, indeed, none of their business and they had rooms to turn down. So rejoice ye Ectomites! Rejoice, for Santa is born, so that one day he may die for your sins and, on the third day and on that day for every year after, rise from the dead delivering gifts while continuing to quell his eternal hunger for brains. Merry Christmas!

For the holiday season we bring you one of the best Christmas songs out there. Whether you’re enjoying roasted chestnuts and the warmth of friends and family or drinking yourself into a stupor in a dark corner Christmas in Sarajevo is the perfect seasonal accompaniment.

Sadly, this song runs afoul of the oft bemoaned stereotype of great songs having awful videos. Replete with a windblown silhouette of an 80’s rocker and an immediate desire to smack the obnoxiously saccharine 8 year old featured it’s probably best you simply listen and enjoy.

The front cover for a lost manuscript by Penny Arcade’s own Gabe and Tycho, which — if found — would no doubt fill the vacuum of Eldritch Christmas Literature with a timeless classic.

Update: And the full manuscript has been found, thanks to an ectotweet by sonofsanta, who proved resourceful enough to click the “Next” button at the bottom of every page.

The Last Christmas [Penny Arcade]

As you watch this video please, feel free to hum the main theme from Terminator 2, it lends ambiance to a clip showing a toy that we want, nay need, desperately, like air or coffee. For anyone who lives in Japan we will accept as many of these as you are able to send. If it helps, we will give you Qais in exchange. He’s slightly used but I would grade him VG+.

Lokuloku [Product Page] : Gizmodo

A fantastic eleven inch Krampus figurine on ebay. The item is a promotion for Dark Carnival, a comic being published by Fantagraphics in 2008 and is hand sculpted and painted by the artist Miss Behave a.k.a. Summer Boothe. Alas, the auction has ended but perhaps it will be relisted, in which case I order all Ectomites (or, perhaps, just one Ectomite with some disposable income) to chip in and purchase it, at which time you may mail it to my hovel deep in the forest.

vintage style huge KRAMPUS DEVIL Christmas Decoration [ebay] : The Seven Deadly Sinners

Mike DiPetrillo has been a good buddy of mine since I noticed his AIM name, listed on Threadless (where he was responsible for one of their most popular designs) was a line from an extremely obscure song by an extremely obscure band. We bonded instantly over our superior taste in music, then discovered we lived in the same city. One bubble tea and horror movie later, we were budskis.

But I only did it because I knew, one day, I’d be physically close enough to one of Mike’s exquisite paintings that I’d be able to grab it and run. He’d invite me over for a few rounds of Bomberman and hummus (this is what people do in Seattle for fun), and I’d burgle the shit out of him.

Those Ectomites in Seatown tonight will have their chance to make good on my threats. Mike is having some sort of psychedelic art show at a cafe in the University District. He is claiming that his paintings will actually glow in the haughty dimness of the venue. Observe:

Event Info
Name: STAR SHOW
Tagline: Sit around and look at glow in the dark paintings while being a fucking snob

Host: Mike DiPetrillo
Type: Music/Arts - Exhibit

Time and Place
Date: Friday, December 7, 2007
Time: 7:00pm - 9:00pm
Location: Solstice Cafe
Street: 4116 University Way NE
City/Town: Seattle, WA

Contact Info
Phone: 425.941.3455
Email: mikeatron@gmail.com

In all seriousness, Timmy, it doesn’t matter. We’re all going to be devoured before you ever get that PS Triple.

Santa Cthulhu Needle Felted Figure [Super Punch]

Philosophically, I tend to think Christmas trees should be staggered with a thousand small, colorful toys, as if Santa’s sled exploded over an evergreen. Just like the jumble of gifts beneath, a tree’s decorations should be a chaos of joy, with no aesthetic direction whatsoever.

That said, of course I think this thematically cephalopodic Christmas tree is the best I’ve ever seen. And look at the adorable girls who helped grandma decorate it! Future handmaidens of the tentacle, they. Send pictures of your ultimate consumation, ladies! That will be my Christmas.

Please click through. This tree is great.

99 Octopi [My Byrd House] : Thanks, Andrew!