For the cephalophile looking to fill the gaping hole in their collection of extremely gaudy jewelry Chuck Clemency presents this octopodal ring, from his Gem Treasures collection, for your consideration. Crafted from 14K gold it is bristling with 67 precious stones, 62 of which are diamonds. A must have for grandmothers or aspiring hip-hop artists hoping to encase themselves in pimpin’ ice.
A melancholy melody for your Friday morning. Andrew Bird’s “Lull” is a beautiful piece of music although, not being familiar with his catalog, I can’t say if this is due to his songwriting ability or the exceptional work of Dianogah. In the end I suppose it matters not, as the final product is brilliant regardless and the video compliments it perfectly. Using cutout transparencies it tells the story of a staid, button-down gentleman who falls into a passionate affair with a squid. As we here at Ectomo can attest, these trysts never go to plan, however; the tempestuous nature of squids making them less than ideal for long-term relationships. It all leads to a sad — and some would say, inevitable — conclusion.
It comes as no surprise that the unifying force between the constantly warring Octopi and their Squid cousins comes in the form of Japanese schoolgirls.
This, ladies and gentlemen, is the reason the Ectomo staff is no longer welcome at the Seattle Aquarium. In their defense, it was my birthday, the little critters stare up at you like puppies in a pet store window, waggling their tentacles as adorably as a tentacle can be waggled (and depending on your peccadilloes that can be fairly adorable to say nothing of enticing).
Brass Goggles is kind enough to remind us that that yesterday was Air Kraken Day, a day set aside to commemorate this historical document of an attack by an Air Kraken on an ocean-bound steamboat. The scene of carnage and destruction is serenely overlooked by a hot-air balloon floating on the horizon. Contemporary historians suggest that this balloon was commanded by none other than the insane abyssmonaut Muad-Dib Al Masoud, directing the ectoplasmic tentacles with a combination of mad chantings and incense of extraterrestrial origin.
Brass Goggles suggests that her readers should all go out and fly kites shaped like air krakens to commemorate the event, and while we’re a day late to the festivities, we’re going to suggest our readers do the same.
For cephalophiles — those of us for whom the stray flickering of a sinuous tentacle across the screen is mirrored by a ghostly tentacle tugging in our laps — this composite by Rachel Blaser, simply titled “Octopus” is enough to blow out our accumbens nucleus like an egg tossed into the microwave. And for the rest of you, it should still be breath-taking.
There’s some mysterious story being told here, though I’m not sure what. Octopuses do not usually lissomely recline on outcroppings of rock. Is it a photograph of an octopus scooped up by a deep-sea tornado and deposited on some Himalayan mountain-top? Or does it reveal a strange parallel in evolution on some harsh alien world, as a silicon-based royal octopus regally bathes in mists of sulfuric acid, dreaming of worlds and Asiatic vaginas to conquer.
The trend among body-mod enthusiasts to implant chunks of shaped silicon under the skin is one that never sat well with me. From a purely aesthetic standpoint the implants rarely seem to take on a well defined shape. From a personal standpoint the idea of having a piece of plastic shoved under a flap of skin, all without the benefit of anesthetic, has simply never appealed to me. I make no judgements on the people that do choose to get these implants, but never considered it for myself. Until now.
These sucker implants seem to be exactly what this kind of procedure was made for. They have a slightly amorphous quality, thus not suffering from the swollen look this type of mod tends to take on (post-healing of course) and I’m certain there are more than a few of you that would withstand a bit of pain in return for an arm full of suckers. This is simply a fantastic execution of an idea, as though each sub-dermal implant was another step in the march toward the concept’s perfection.
The colors in this photograph by Stephen Strange are simply fantastic, and the hard edged lines make it almost appear as if the octopus is a tattoo that has begun to crawl out of her skin. The effect is hypnotic.
Ever wanted to have a tentacle arm? Do you and the little lady (or little man) have a hankering for some hentai inspired role-playing? Gaia Online (insert 4chan memery) has you covered, then, with this offering of suction-cup bedecked, polyester goodness.
Tentacle Arm [Gaia Online Store] : Kotaku : Thanks to Ninja-bot and Chris Ferstad!
Yuji Moriguchi continues the tradition pioneered by Katsushika Hokusai with his modern, ukiyo-e styled illustrations, many of which, of course, feature cephalopods. From left to right: Early Afternoon Affair, Veranda, and Tide.
With a delicious lunch having slithered its way from the depths of Davey Jones’ locker, an Ectomite if I’ve ever seen one stares glassy eyed into the gaping maw of disgustingly erotic possibilities Hokusai teaches us to expect from octopi. Little does she know, our be-tentacled friend has more fiendish plans in store…
• An accusatory finger points at the sphincter of a nine-tentacled octopus. A nonopus? Thanks, Karen!
• Cycloptic space squidling hugs onto the side of a Mars rover in the latest Ectomo-endorsed Threadless tee. Thanks, Blackrockbob!
• Brad sends in this news report about a strange virus hitting the most remote island on earth, triumphantly crowing “IT HAS BEGUN!” R’lyeh, anyone?
• Creationism dismissed as a ‘kind of paganism’ by Vatican’s astronomer. This story seems to be surprising a lot of people, but Catholicism has been edging away from a literal interpretation of Genesis for centuries now. This guy’s making some good points. ectotweeted by Wolven.
• Nicholas Cage goes absolutely zonkers when confronted with the prospect of authographing the six breasts of three twins. Hey, who wouldn’t? Ectotweeted by oldhat.
• The best thing to come out of yesterday’s inaugural ectochat: “Marmaduke, are you even listening to me you zany dog?”
Philosophically, I tend to think Christmas trees should be staggered with a thousand small, colorful toys, as if Santa’s sled exploded over an evergreen. Just like the jumble of gifts beneath, a tree’s decorations should be a chaos of joy, with no aesthetic direction whatsoever.
That said, of course I think this thematically cephalopodic Christmas tree is the best I’ve ever seen. And look at the adorable girls who helped grandma decorate it! Future handmaidens of the tentacle, they. Send pictures of your ultimate consumation, ladies! That will be my Christmas.
In sheer defiance of the World Wide Web Consortium's will, Ectomo was designed using a non-web-standard font. Luckily, it is included in the excellent font pack released by the H.P. Lovecraft Historical Society, which can be freely downloaded in Mac and PC formats here. Ectomo should still look fine without it, though.
