In the history of secret weapons programs and government cover-ups, none is so chilling as Germany’s Volkswaffe program. It was begun sometime before the 1936 Olympics in Berlin, under the guise of producing a cheap, reliable automobile for the common man. Instead, Ferdinand Porsche’s bulbous design was used in an effort to produce an agile, lightweight fighter car for use as an elite airborne unit in Hitler’s plans to bring Europe under his control; a squadron of death-dealing Herbies emblazoned with the Balkenkreuz.
Seen here for the first time are documents, declassified footage, and eyewitness accounts of an unknown chapter in German aerospace history, and a testament to the extent of Nazi ambition and hubris. For the first time, the story of those madmen who attempted to build a car that would touch the sky will be told; and hopefully those who would attempt the same will take note, lest history be repeated.
In 1945 the Nazis fled to the moon. In 2018 they are coming back.
Two sentences was all it took to get me more interested in a film than I’ve been in years. Hopefully this — in concert with Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow — is the beginning of a new golden age in the pulp scifi of yesteryear being brought to the theater.
Upon first meeting Fulton I was struck by the choice of facial hair, its sparseness said —at least to me — that this was a headstrong youth whose taste was of dubious quality. My first impression of the boy was one of revulsion, I admit. Later I would be shocked to discover the fame and high regard he had earned from the other rent boys and members of my particular circle. It was only upon seeing him again — devoid of that hirsute monstrosity — that I understood why.
Bernard, John. Oscar Wilde: Images From the Life Of Britain’s Most Famous Homosexual With Commentary Taken From His Many Correspondences London: Leatherman Press, 1929.
“Having lost most of his money in pork futures, Brownlee turned once again to his favorite mistress, the emerald harlot of Paris: absinthe. It was not surprising to find him in one of Tirana’s many drinking parlors, his moustache unkempt, his trousers damp. It would be some time before he emerged from his stupor and by that time most critics agreed that his best plays were, alas, firmly behind him. Certainly no one could fault his enthusiasm for his newly rediscovered sobriety, but one had to question the new, Brechtian influences found in the abysmal March of Pygmies with its all midget cast and use of livestock.”
Waechter, Ewald. The Life and Times of John Brownlee: Being a Record of Horrid Practices and Terrible Excesses As Catalogued In His Many Letters To His Mother and Friends. Vol. 6, 1898-1930 Berlin: Barth Brüder, 1963.
In 2238 the first fully human-passable android was developed by the AI Underground in what historians would come to call “Genesis 2.0″. The poor confused half-breed slipped into this world from the comfort of a cozy lab-grown womb with the full weight of the world on his shoulders and a legacy of terrible, unavoidable, blood-soaked horrors he had yet to fulfill.
Early in the 22nd Century the recently formed World Government passed legislation declaring there could exist only one fast food mascot. The reasoning behind the decision remains a mystery to this day, though conspiracy theorists and rational thinkers suspect it was simply a display of power by an infant government. The tyrannical government’s method of pairing down what had become a veritable orgy of brightly colored clowns and cows with opinions on our dietary habits? Gladiatorial combat.
Long and hard they fought, showing bravery and cowardice in equal measure. Finally, from the viscera strewn pits of endless fighting emerged a victor. A relative unknown in his world, yet no less savage and cunning for his lack of infamy. This man, nay, this hero goes by the name of McClucksky. May his epic never be forgotten.
The transformation of mankind’s idealized future over the last century is a fascinating thing. Our tendency to speculate wildly is our greatest trait, resulting in a rich history of lofty, unrealistic goals and incredible literature that only serves to drive us to speculate further; to hope for a future like nothing we’ve ever seen.
From a sky full of hot-air balloons, from which dapper gents doff their hats to ladies on pedal powered flying machines, to pill-food and brushed chrome flying cars, to now, where our idealized future includes skull-mounted USB jacks and HUD’s. However, our visions of the future have a distinct difference from those of our forebears. Namely in that we envision the possibility of a dystopian future, a blasted, rusted heath on which we eke out our misery filled days; which we dream of alongside the optimistic fantasy of a future of soft, off-white plastics, bio-integrated technology, and utopian ideals.
It’s almost as if in the last 50 years or so we’ve finally started to realize that the future might not be coming to save us, but that it might just be one more boot to humanity’s collective chin.
Say what you want about organized religion, but if the birth of Christ had featured the original members of the Monster Squad with The Bride of Frankenstein as the mother I’d be rolling in the aisles with the best of them.
Take 5’s PSP strategy game Jeanne D’Arc takes the legend of La Pucelle and twists the history in such a way that the English command armadas of pig demons, skeletons, and snake men against the noble French peasantry, who are led by Jeanne herself, wielding a magical bracelet that allows her to transform into a cyborg super-knight when she makes a Power Rangers style wrist snap.
I’m loving it. Jeanne D’Arc’s unapologetic dismissal of history is ninety percent of its charm. But for those expecting a more dry, ponderous and historically-accurate strategy game, the first five minutes are a real mind-bender, as a cadaverous Duke of Bedford tells his young nephew, King Henry VI, the real reason behind the 100 Years War: a demon from another dimension invading Earth with an army of monsters that could only be stopped by a quintuplet of laser-shooting power knights.
By the end of the video? King Henry looks like he’s about to start projectile spewing pea soup, the Duke of Bedford is sporting shadow tentacles from his jester hat, and a loyal retainer has been slurped up into another dimension. And it gets even better! This game is just totally awesome.
In sheer defiance of the World Wide Web Consortium's will, Ectomo was designed using a non-web-standard font. Luckily, it is included in the excellent font pack released by the H.P. Lovecraft Historical Society, which can be freely downloaded in Mac and PC formats here. Ectomo should still look fine without it, though.
