There are, I suppose, two ways to take this ad for Goodyear’s “Double Eagle” tires. The first is that a woman, incapable of understanding the subtleties of using a jack to raise a portion of her car off the ground and then having to deal with the mysterious complexity of threaded nuts and bolts, will walk for what seems like miles, running the risk of being dragged off into the bushes to be raped and murdered by a man or group of men, only so that she can get to a phone — because those broads love to just yak yak yak, am I right fellas?

The other way to take it is that men can easily be replaced by dual walled, rubber tires.

When There’s No Man Around - Goodyear Commercial [YouTube]

Scot points out that your cheap, uncomfortable paper towels may be turning your employees against you. Indeed, this gentleman has already acquired both the demeanor and moustache of the Communist. In other news, were you aware that you can catch Fascism from public restroom toilet seats? Believe it.

Is your washroom breeding Bolsheviks? [Flickr] uploaded by Will S. : Socyberty : Neatorama

My sincerest apologies, ye denizens of the wonderful, monstrous Ecto-Nation, for the deplorable lack of content over the last few days. Your outrage at the passing of a Monday unmoustachioed is, of course, understandable. Had I been able to drag myself to my computer I would have most assuredly fulfilled my duties however, due to the fact that I am a young man in possession of the body of a centenarian, I could not. No, dear readers, the past three days have been spent on my back, the muscles of my lumbar gripping the delicate nerves of my spine in a vise-like death grip. Only through sheer willpower — and 10 milligrams of Cyclobenzaprine — have a been able to lurch over to the keyboard. I pray this will serve as explanation should my normal, typo-laden musings be more…laden…than usual.

That out of the way, on to the clip. The above is an ad for Nike Women featuring Nicola Sanders, who I assume is a runner of some repute and whose organs and muscles all have mouths which they use to spit gibberish at each other. Also, her brain wears a monocle, an image which is so fitting that I dare say I will be unable to look at a brain ever again without superimposing the eyepiece upon it. The whole concept is extremely simple and the animation takes it just far enough into weird territory to work without coming off as horrifying. That’s how it strikes me at least, your unmedicated mileage may vary. Creativity has the hi-res version.

Pub Nike - Nicola Sanders [YouTube] : Creativity

A Bridgestone advertisement, chronicling a dog’s attempt to end his own life after witnessing his bitch’s infidelity, leads to an Ectomite brainstorming session, not regarding the sale of rubber radials, but intead selling the act itself:

I can see it now, The scene opens on a suburban housewife in a black and white kitchen, frantically chopping away at ( and missing) a tomato. The baritone male voice over begins over the scene. “Every day tasks are such a bother. Why not just kill yourself?” The woman turns to the camera, smiles, and then turns the knife quickly on herself.

Coming to a TV near you.

Comment by Cameron — August 27, 2008