MeatWater

Many are familiar with the rejuvenating properties of a bottle of Vitamin Water following an evening spent waging a campaign of genocide on one’s own braincells. Yet while replenishing depleted stores of ephemeral get-up-and-go, Vitamin Water lacks that certain something, that special ingredient that truly puts the spring back in the step of an otherwise lackluster, shuffling crawl. That ingredient? Why, meat of course!

It’s already been proven that household objects are made better with a hot meat infusion, it’s only logical that water too would benefit from an addition of nature’s delicious murder-candy. Now the choice between sating the rumbling nausea of a vicious hangover or enduring the slings and arrows of outrageous five foot trips to the kitchen (and the ensuing near-sysiphean 2 minute wait for that damn burrito to cook all the way through) is made all the more easy. Simply lie back and sup from the bountiful teat of water that satisfies all the needs of the terminally self-dehydrated. They even make Eliza’s favorite flavor!

MeatWater [Human Under Construction]